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Q. We missed seeing you in the press pit at the Arnold Classic this year. Were you embarrassed to sit with us crazy photographers, or what? A. As most of you, my loyal readers, already know, I run a hardcore magazine called Rx Muscle and I am usually granted two press passes to each contest so my photographer can get good quality photos and I can accurately assess the competition up on stage. For the past two Arnold Classic weekends (2003 and 2004), Jim Lorimer and his staff denied Rx Muscle press passes. When I called Lorimer’s office, I spoke to the man in charge and he told me Jim Lorimer didn’t feel the content of my magazine was “appropriate” and therefore, he denied us access to the press pit. My immediate response to his retort was, “You mean to tell me that Denise Masino’s magazine, Muscle Elegance, is “appropriate,” but Rx Muscle is not? Muscular Development magazine (which contains my column, “The Anabolic Freak”) is “appropriate” but Rx Muscle is not?”The man’s only response was, “I don’t make the decisions, Jim Lorimer does!” Now, I have to ask myself, why would Jim Lorimer allow these other magazines to cover the contest but not Rx Muscle? I cannot believe that Jim Lorimer would practice censorship in an age where an Austrian immigrant, seven-time Mr. Olympia and Hollywood action star was given the opportunity to become governor of California. Perhaps it was because Muscular Development and Muscle Elegance were both paid sponsors who bought booths at the Arnold Expo and Rx Muscle did not purchase a booth because I was lucky enough to have been given free booth space by a supplement company that owed me a favor?Albert Einstein summed it up best when he said, "Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.” Maybe I’m just crazy?
Q. I'm an average short guy who works security. I need help in getting the size and power it takes to throw guys on their butts. I want to juice but don't know what to take and how much to take. I was thinking about some Aqua-Test and Trenbolone, followed up with some growth hormone. I don't want to look like a bodybuilder. I just want to be big and strong. Please give me some good advice on what you think would benefit me. You rock!
A. The best anabolic stack to put on size and strength would have to be 1,000 milligrams of testosterone cypionate per week, 25-75 milligrams of Anadrol per day and 50-75 milligrams of trenbolone every other day. This potent, but slightly toxic, combination should elevate your androgen levels through the roof. The advantages of heightened androgen levels are rage, strength and heightened alertness. The disadvantages (and you can’t avoid those) are excessive water retention, high blood pressure, increased acne and slight liver toxicity. My suggestion to you is to stay on this regimen for no longer than eight to 10 weeks and then cut out the trenbolone and Anadrol and switch to Deca (400-500 milligrams per week) or Equipoise (300-400 milligrams per week) for another eight to 10 weeks. Q. What is the Arnold Classic Fitness Expo really like? Are there hot chicks all over the place? Are there monsters like you roaming throughout the building? A. The best answer I can give you is, “Go to my website (www.DavePalumbo.com), click on the gallery section and check out all the hype and glamour for yourself. Q. I train really hard in the gym and I take all the right supplements, yet I cannot, for the life of me, stick to my diet. People tell me I have great genetics for bodybuilding, but every time I compete I do poorly because I just don’t get ripped. Are there any tricks, shortcuts, or ways I can motivate myself so I’ll be able to achieve my dream of being a professional bodybuilder? A. To quote one of America’s greatest distance runners, Steve Prefontaine,“To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift.” With regard to your case, the gift Prefontaine spoke of was your genetically blessed physique. Making up excuses for why you cannot stick to the diet, or why you cannot endure the pain of the sacrifice, or why you feel the need to seek outside counsel when you already know that the answer lies deep within yourself, only makes you sound like a quitter. If you always do your best, you will never be disappointed with the outcome. Prefontaine claims he won so many races because he could endure more pain than all the other runners.
Q. I eat eight high-protein meals per day and I feel like I’m retaining food in my stomach. My belly is always bloated and I have trouble moving my bowels. What can I do? A. I had a similar problem when I first started “bulking” up. I would consume eight to 12 meals per day (sometimes swallowing upwards of six protein shakes per day). All that protein with such small amounts of fiber led to a very bloated, distended state. I was uncomfortable and I didn’t understand why I was feeling that way. I did a little research and spoke to a few nutritional experts and I realized I wasn’t even coming close to eating enough fiber in my diet. On their suggestion, I purchased a big canister of sugar-free Metamucil (that contains psyllium as its active ingredient). Psyllium is a bulk-forming laxative and is high in both fiber and mucilage. Psyllium seeds contain 10–30 percent mucilage. The laxative properties of psyllium are due to the swelling of the husk when it comes in contact with water. This forms a gelatinous mass that keeps feces hydrated and soft, provided it’s taken with sufficient water. The resulting bulk stimulates a reflex contraction of the walls of the bowel, followed by emptying.The suggested intake of psyllium husks to treat constipation is one teaspoon (approximately five grams) three times per day. I either mix it directly into my protein shakes or I mix it in about four ounces of water and swallow it down as quickly as possible. (Metamucil is probably the best tasting version of psyllium on the market).
Q. I have been lifting now for many years and recently I have been contemplating using some steroids (due to my inability to put on any more solid mass). I am six feet tall, 190 pounds, with low body fat. My goal is to get to about 210-215 pounds. However, I do not want that dramatic effect, where it would seem evident that I’m on “something.” I was wondering if you have any suggestion for mass-building stacks and dosages. Additionally, I have changed my diet and I am attempting to consume about 200 grams of protein per day. After extensive research, I have decided to use some Deca and Dianabol. What dosage would you suggest?
A. Your situation is very similar to many other bodybuilders out there. You want to keep improving and adding lean muscle; however, you seem to have hit a plateau and you are now contemplating using a little bit of anabolic assistance. My best suggestion to you would be to up your protein intake to about 350 grams per day. If you do nothing else, this alone will probably result in dramatic physique changes. Additionally, if you wish to subtlety gain muscle, using Dianabol and Deca is not the best solution. The water retention from the two drugs will inevitably give you up as having crossed over to the “dark side” as we, in the industry, like to jokingly refer to it. A better solution would be to do a 10-12 week cycle of Winstrol (50 milligrams every other day) with Primobolin depot (200-300 milligrams per week). This anabolic stack will give you just enough anabolic punch to keep your muscle gains flowing, while minimizing any unpleasant side effects such as acne, edema and pituitary suppression.
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